I might be wrong and can't find a reference now but it think it was Auden
who said poems aren't finished, just abandoned.
On Thu, Mar 27, 2008 at 11:06 AM, Halvard Johnson <[log in to unmask]>
wrote:
> Hmm, I've always thought anything one writes to
> be a draft--somewhere between and including the first
> draft and the final one. (To the extent that anything is final,
> of course.)
>
> But then sometimes a cold beer is a draft too.
>
> Hal
>
> "We are the zanies of sorrow."
> --Oscar Wilde
>
> Halvard Johnson
> ================
> [log in to unmask]
> http://home.earthlink.net/~halvard/index.html
> http://entropyandme.blogspot.com
> http://imageswithoutwords.blogspot.com
> http://www.hamiltonstone.org
> http://home.earthlink.net/~halvard/vidalocabooks.html
>
>
> On Mar 26, 2008, at 10:25 AM, David Bircumshaw wrote:
>
> > Hi Martin
> >
> > well I wrote it yesterday so I think it qualifies as a draft.
> >
> > I'm not wild about the first line, it could get absorbed into an
> > eventual
> > (final) title. Perhaps. I do sometimes write "social historical"
> > poetry but
> > it's not easy to incorporate the necessity of facts within the
> > requirements
> > of poetry. Such facts tend to be lumpy and arrhythmical. Like
> > handling great
> > globs of wet sticky clay.
> >
> > best
> >
> > Dave
> >
> > On 26/03/2008, Martin Dolan <[log in to unmask]> wrote:
> >>
> >> Hi Dave
> >>
> >> Not the sort of thing idea, but if this is a draft, it's a good one.
> >>
> >> I like the way you contrast the specificity of the 1848 events with
> >> the
> >> vagueness/fadedness of the link to you. The interplay of images
> >> (such as
> >> between the fuse of the Manifesto and the firedamp) works well for me
> >> (had to check up on Kossuth, though).
> >>
> >> I'm not sure about the first line - even if it's necessary in
> >> light of
> >> the title. Also not sure about co-patrilineal: trying to compress to
> >> much into the line, maybe?
> >>
> >> If you've got more like these, I'd like to see them.
> >>
> >> Regards
> >>
> >>
> >> Martin
> >>
> >>> Circum circa
> >>>
> >>> Circa a European Year of Revolutions,
> >>> of Kossuth and Cavour and Louis Napoleon's Eighteenth Brumaire,
> >>> when Chartists massed, faintly tinted in life colours,
> >>> in the first known crowd photograph
> >>> and a grim economist fused a hissing manifesto,
> >>> one man found everything to lose,
> >>> one man preserved
> >>>
> >>> by the Heanor and District Historical Society,
> >>> one man who might have been
> >>> co-patrilineal
> >>>
> >>> to this one, scribbling here, a bone trace of age unstated,
> >>> Joseph of my surname, asphyxiated (circa)
> >>> 1848 at a firedamp lit hard seam at Loscoe pit.
> >>>
> >>>
> >>
> >
> >
> >
> > --
> > David Bircumshaw
> > Website and A Chide's Alphabet
> > http://homepage.ntlworld.com/david.bircumshaw/
> > The Animal Subsides http://www.arrowheadpress.co.uk/books/animal.html
> > Leicester Poetry Society: http://www.poetryleicester.co.uk
>
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