Max, this has the same problems as the comet snap. maybe you should
get out of the dog/wife/car setup? the poem is bad, up until the last
stanza, which is excellent & would be an excellent ending if the rest
of the poem were any good.
KS
On 14/02/07, Max Richards <[log in to unmask]> wrote:
> Her heart leaps up when she beholds
> the rainbow in the sky -
> she drives towards it down George Street
> and up to Church, one eye
> on the road, one on the sky.
>
> She pulls up in our driveway
> glad to be met by me
> and the dogs, saying Come and see
> the best double rainbow
> in all history.
>
> I leash the dogs and lead them out
> across to the park.
> Gold light from the west pours across
> the wide vista, dark
> pines are bright, gum-tree bark
>
> glistens, a fine rain falls on me
> and the unconcerned dogs,
> who yearn towards the front door
> expecting their mistress to emerge.
> I gaze at the panorama
>
> of sparkling hillside and bright mist
> and high perfect bows
> with their several colours distinct
> and I long to snap the vista
> quickly before fading occurs.
>
> The front door is open; she, usually
> so prompt with camera,
> neglects to come out. Finally
> I call. But no, it's too wet
> for her to join us - not yet
>
> while it's still raining.
> No rain no rainbow, dearest.
> I stand reverently in the wet
> gazing at the sky, dampest
> creature, dogless, wifeless.
>
> Wednesday 14 February 2007
>
> Max Richards
> Doncaster, Vic.
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>
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