I agree about the last stanza. Very strong. Very passionate. It builds and
holds the reader there.
Tina
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----- Original Message -----
From: "Douglas Barbour" <[log in to unmask]>
To: <[log in to unmask]>
Sent: Wednesday, September 27, 2006 11:27 PM
Subject: Re: Snapshot 27 September 02006
> That final stanza is so sharp, Sharon, that I want to get there sooner, so
> felt the 2nd wasn't so necessary, & the cut from 'maple' to 'around me'
> works just fine...
>
> Doug
> On 27-Sep-06, at 3:26 PM, sharon brogan wrote:
>
>> this morning smells of cinnamon,
>> of nutmeg and nostalgia, the red
>> sting of striped wasps and afternoon
>> falling from the sky like maple
>>
>> like oak, a yellow day, tasting
>> of lemons and the sharp songs
>> of sparrows, a round day, an oval
>> day, an egg day, the day takes shape
>>
>> around me but i am an absence today
>> i am not here, i am not there, the day
>> passes brightly around this vacancy
>> an egg-shaped emptiness, yolkless
>>
>> heartless, a finality here where there
>> is nothing but dreams, floods, refugees
>> thousands of lost children, pets, these
>> two wasps mating on the fountain
>>
>> thinking not of drowning, no discussion
>> no political debate, no faceted visions
>> no fear of the future, only this essential
>> desperate and glorious gesture
>>
>> --
>> ~ SB =^..^=
>>
>> http://www.sbpoet.com
>>
>>
> Douglas Barbour
> 11655 - 72 Avenue NW
> Edmonton Ab T6G 0B9
> (780) 436 3320
> http://www.ualberta.ca/~dbarbour/
>
> Latest book: Continuations (with Sheila E Murphy)
> http://www.uap.ualberta.ca/UAP.asp?LID=41&bookID=664
>
> Where philosophy stops, poetry is impelled to begin. He was
> a man, far away from home, biting his nails at destiny.
>
> Susan Howe
>
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