Shalom my poetbrother,
Thank you for the input as always...you are very astute.
kol tuv, Ryfkah
PS. I am busy with preparing for teaching and also more grad studies.
In a message dated 08/15/2006 7:14:01 AM, [log in to unmask] writes:
<< Hi Ryfkah,
This works really well for me.
It sounds good: the "yearn" and "return" sounds have a kind of ache in them.
I did wonder about having the "as" in the middle line - I can see it's there
for the syllable count - though I don't think it needs to be dropped to the
next line!
I also like the word "rising" - it feels so much slower than "rises"!
Yeh.
It's kinda quiet at the moment... holidays I guess.
Bob >>
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