Dear Sally,
  I liked the idea of this, about the intimacy of the relationship, but I
thought the ending was too melodramatic--a bit silly, I'm afraid, and spoils
it for me. How would the narrator know that the grip was 'haunted'?. It
could just be a pain spasm, say. If the narrator's sinister inference is
supposed to tell us something about her (could be a him, of course, but I
feel it's a female) I think that should have be hinted at earlier in the
poem. Coming out of nowhere like this, it just didn't wotk for me.
There are places where the poem can be trimmed e.g. you don't need to have
'the heels of their feet' --their heeks (or feet) is enough. I'm not sure
about the scar wobbling under folds of flesh--wouldn't be on one of the
folds?
'She grumbled at the tangled hair
that unknotted as she combed.'
I wonder if she would grumble if the hair unknotted so easily? Wouldn't it
something be more like: she grumbled at tangled hair that knotted on the
comb..
Is 'manipulate' the right verb with tasks?
'She saw hidden anxiety in nail bitten stumps.' I'd think biting fingernails
revealed anxiety, so not very well 'hidden'.

Kind regards,
Margaret


----- Original Message ----- 
From: "Sally James" <[log in to unmask]>
To: <[log in to unmask]>
Sent: Sunday, January 15, 2006 1:14 PM
Subject: [THE-WORKS] New Sub The carer


The carer.


Washing people was part of her job,
every bit of them she bathed,
got to know their intimate parts
even their partners hadn't seen,
like the hair between their buttocks
and the bits of hard skin
on the heals of their feet.
She would ask about the old scar
that glistened and wobbled
under folds of flesh,
tell them about the wart on their back
they had never seen.
She grumbled at the tangled hair
that unknotted as she combed.
Smiled at tattoos that hid in the undergrowth
with names like Stella and Mary
embellished in a heart.
Most of all, it was the hands
that grabbed her, lifelines
that anchored her to their world,
she wondered where fingers had probed
what tasks they had manipulated.
She saw hidden anxiety in nail bitten stumps.
The callused palms ingrained with work.
Wondered what secrets bony digits held.
And once, when she washed flayed fingers
she felt them curl into a haunted grip
and though facial expressions gave nothing away,
she knew that those hands had done evil.


Sally James