Hi Sally,
Thanks for the comments. I think I ain't yet got the start of the poem
working right. I think the word "some" will be leaving the poem in a hurry!
Bob
>From: sally evans <[log in to unmask]>
>Reply-To: The Pennine Poetry Works <[log in to unmask]>
>To: [log in to unmask]
>Subject: Re: New Sub: Such Enlightening
>Date: Mon, 20 Feb 2006 22:14:14 +0000
>
>Ilike this; I'd prefer 'a holiday cottage' to 'some holiday cottage' as you
>seem to be describing an actual one. I cant work out the grammatical reason
>for this but you are giving the scene outside the holiday cottage so it
>isnt
>'some' cottage. It could even be the holiday cottage, or their holiday
>cottage I suppose. I think it has to be a sort of vaguer concept if its
>"some" cottage but I cant work it out.
>
>cheers
>SallyE
>
>on 20/2/06 4:32 pm, Bob Cooper at [log in to unmask] wrote:
>
> > Reeth is a small town in Swaledale, North Yorkshire. Maybe 2 pubs, maybe
>a
> > couple of cafes, maybe a dozen shops, and that's it. But do you need to
>know
> > that? Possibly not.
> >
> > All comments welcome!
> >
> > Such Enlightening
> >
> > New Year’s Eve is a town like Reeth
> > where local accents are different
> > and in some holiday cottage Co-op carrier bags
> > with clinking bottles, bags of pasta, are carried from a car
> > that ticks in the damp air, its windows gleaming
> > with lights from the Christmas tree on the green.
> > Footprints on the moist pavement disappear.
> > The door closes shutting out darkness for the evening
> > until at midnight so many people, unfamiliar to the place,
> > stand outside, glasses in hand, listening to the air
> > more than to each other, their breath rising
> > to a drunken moon whose light hides many faint stars.
> >
> > Bob Cooper
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