Perfect and Mouldy P,
My eternal gratefulness for the beautiful new t-shirts you sent me by way of
Vileboris who at first refused to let them out of his vile mouth. But, bcuz
I do not have a catflap, nor catnip, nor even a cat, I felt perfectly
comfortable kicking his cat-ass out my back door----just a little kick, you
understand, Darlingkins, just enuff to let him know that CATWOMAN LA GRANDE
don't take no stuff, especially off a cat who is cruel to my Most Adored
Elongated One.
I told VB that I have his number now (by the way, Awesome Man, the number 9
is already taken by Steve Jobs, so you/Albert cannot have it; I will save
the number 10 for you as well as wait eagerly to see if you have been
adjudged worthy of it . . . it is so tricky to say anything nowadays what
with the censors and all).
In other words, I told VB that never once has he treated you right. That,
in itself, is sufficient, if you ask me which nobody is, to give him to PETA
and see what they would do with his evil little cat-self. Seldom do you
hear me pounce on someone, Lively Lover Lips, but I must assert my
pouncingness this time so that you are not done-in by VB's petty cat games.
I suggest that you get a dog so that he and VB can go one on one, and I
think we all know who's gonna win that contest, Dude!
You have (pardon me for deviating, O Deviant Pardoner; I am simply taking
these few minutes to do what ALL women can do better than ALL men which is
to multi-task; hence and howsomever I am disrobing while taking off my robe,
checking out the t-shirts from my Inconsolably Gorgeous Hunk, putting them
on over my head, pulling them down over my (censored) lightbulbs which are
ever turned on, and then adjusting my (censored) (censored again) so that my
awesome armpits don't become constrained) implied to me that you and Albert
are one. At first I found that hard to believe bcuz Albert seems to have
gained no weight nor other attributes. Plus, I could hardly understand that
if he was standing in the room right next to me as I typed my email messages
to you, well, how could he be you.
But here is what decided the issue: I did as you suggested, O Massive
Masculinity. I, in the heat of what most folks call passion (but I call
folks a cab), surreptitiously yelled out "Mouldy P!!" prolly more than once.
Well, you guessed it, sweetest P!!!! Albert answered with an equally
arduous yell. And what are the chances of that ever happening? Prolly a
thousand to none! Yes yes yes my every Dream has come true bcuz I wished
upon a star. You and Albert are one, and I am Wonderful!
Well, I guess I have no need to email you anymore, you Wondrous Sneaky Lover
of little ole Potentata! From now on, it's just you and me and Albert,
babe. Does that agree with you and him?
Snuggly OmniPotentata
----- Original Message -----
From: "Patrick McManus" <[log in to unmask]>
To: <[log in to unmask]>
Sent: Saturday, August 13, 2005 2:32 AM
Subject: Re: my new Beingness
> Dear madam OmniPotentata such words! did you not realise well ---ask
> Albert
> if he answers to mouldy P yes you'ved guessed we are one and the same!!!!
> 42 what a magic number his is 9
> Yours fathfully Sweet P retired
> Go easy on the granola and that hot oven
> Vileboris sends his..............
>
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