To Ken:
{Ken, this is Judy Prince writing to you in ValleyGirl and GothGirl Speak. Repeat: this is Judy Prince, even tho I may sound like someone else.}
O.k., Ken, so I wanted to once more thank you for your like awesome going-out-on-a-limbness for me regarding that mess I didn't intend to get you into but then you defended me and therefore I am now declaring My Undying Love for You.
I just got off my shift at Harold's House of Toast, so I may be hallucinating by me having to inhale all that carbon that comes from the toasters, and also by me being SO totally delighted with the raspberry-marshmallow jam---which in my case I put on the deep-fried pecan toast. So if I sound a little more spacy than usual, well, that's the reason.
So, anyway, my Mom said when I told her I was going to declare My Undying Love for You, she said:
"Girl, you never even met this man!"
But I said, "Ma, it isn't about the physical stuff. It's the ultimate in love, it's the un-body kind of love! It's a lot like what my professor in Philo 001 says (yes, Ken, Philo Fer Dummies), the un-erotic kind of love which I forgot what name he called it----Ma, I don't roll my eyes at you when you're telling me about your boyfriends!"
I don't think my Mom believes in the kind of love I have for you, Ken.
Also, she says that I should wonder why you haven't emailed me again after that horrid incident that I caused. She says that probably if you were even the most remote bit interested in me, that you woulda made some teensy tiny effort to get back to me---even if only as a courtesy, or as a soother of my feelings of upsetness.
But I told her that you had More Important Things to do. After all, I think you're a professor, and they continually hafta grade papers and evaluate why students are so stupid. There's a lot to that, and I have finally come to understand it. Like the famous baseball player in this country once said: "You can observe a lot if you just watch." I may not have paraphrased him word for word correctly, Ken.
That reminds, me, too. You said once that it's always good to bolster your ideas with other people's agreeing ideas. But you said to make sure that you say who was giving you those ideas so that you are not thought to be (oh I hate to use this word again, Ken) plagiarizing.
Well, I must disagree here with you. And I do it with all the fibers in my body. Even tho I may not have thought of anything for the first time . . . I mean, even tho I may not be the first one to think of a thing---if I do think of it and nobody told it to me ahead of time and I didn't read it anywhere ahead of time, I think that I should not have to quote other people in order for the professor to give my idea any credit.
The guy that sits next to me in P fer D told me exactly what you told me. But he basically has no moral fabric. He keeps tryna copy my notes and even asks me if he can take them home and study them. He said that professors will not be impressed by any ideas that you just made up on your own. You HAFTA get somebody's name attached to the idea---and the older the name, the better. He keeps Googling names from the Italian Renaissance all the time. What a wasted brain that one is, I tell ya!
O.k., well, it's time for me to sleep for a few so that I can get up before Mom hollers at me about catching the bus for school. Plus I hafta wash out my Harald's uniform for work. I haven't even had time to pick up a book to study for the test today. That's really my own fault, tho, Ken. I took all of my study time to declare my Undying Love for You to you. I hope you're happy! I am! ;-)
It would be just too corny to sign this
Love,
Judy
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