Thanks for the detailed account of the genesis of your snapshot, Lawrence.
I've observed the aftermath of birds having eaten blackberries growing wild
on my property, but not the spiders which may spin their web within that
growth. My initial readings of your text corresponded with your prose
gloss ("an attempt to describe seeing a living creature broken across and
in a bird's beak"). Looking up the definition of "squelching", considering
the implications of "reddish", and wondering about the
concluding "neither . . . shows emotion" led me to concoct a more elaborate
scenario than was warranted. I was immediately suspicious of my secondary
interpretation, however, and therefore decided to query the author.
Barry
On Thu, 22 Sep 2005 09:37:29 +0100, Lawrence Upton
<[log in to unmask]> wrote:
>Hi Barry
>
>I witnessed it. I was ambling up the road and looking carefully for
blackberries, without success. It's a fairly busy road for walkers and all
but the small late sour ones had gone. I hadn't even meant to be there but
got caught up in a movement of 120 cows, which brought everything to a
pause because they do it at their pace. Fell into conversation with the
herdsman and then with another chap coming up behind; and, when the
herdsman turned off, we continued walking and talking. It was only when we
got to the sea, that I realised I had just followed him! It was ok. I was
also just following my nose
>
>Then he asked the time and rushed off to meet his wife!
>
>I sat on a rock. Then I walked back, mentally blackberrying.
>
>It was the bird caught my attention, and I was starting to think how
poorly I could describe it. By which time I was so close I decided to stop
to keep it there. I'm pretty sure I saw a similar bird in Cumrbia, on a
hedge there - though in this case it's a hedge made of granite covered in
green growth.
>
>I was struck by its confidence. LIke a robin in the way it let me approach
and very unexpected away from town.
>
>And during this very small parcel of time, it had been studying the prey.
It adjusted its position a little and I saw what it was after.
>
>I am quite capable of making things up or getting them from books; but
this was a sighting
>
>I was struck by the transformation in a moment. The spider was smashed up
and hanging both sides of the beak, moving a bit. The bird seemed to pause
before completing the operation, possibly because of my proximity. I think
I was writing the poem as I saw it all happen.
>
>Until then I had no snapshot poem and had been thinking of the
ridiculousness of the situation. I was in an area of special scientific
interest also an area of outstanding natural beauty (both official
designations) etc etc. There was so much one could write about for 50 years
without moving
>
>And I was thinking of *moments, wondering how long before this bird would
be wiped out by its own predator... I was thinking of the mechanism of it,
and the increase of that effect into a seeming mechanicity because _their_
faces are not _our_ faces etc etc
>
>everything changed, nothing changed
>
>and the poem changed a lot quite rapidly
>
>I had not *intended the reading you put into it. maybe it's there! the sky
is parcelled out high density by birds of prey and the bird may well be
dead. It almost certainly soon will be
>
>I had a sense I had done what I could to get that sense of everything
killing everything, of everything being doomed - I had rejected an image of
drafts playing because there was no intelligence there
>
>Nevertheless,
>
>squelching
>>both sides of a half-closed beak
>
>was an attempt to describe seeing a living creature broken across and in a
bird's beak
>
>Best answer I can give, I think
>
>Thank you for noticing the poem
>
>Lawrence
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Barry Alpert <[log in to unmask]>
> To: [log in to unmask] <[log in to unmask]>
> Date: Thursday, September 22, 2005 3:33 AM
> Subject: Re: [POETRYETC] snap - reformat
>
>
> On Wed, 21 Sep 2005 21:46:49 +0100, Lawrence Upton
> <[log in to unmask]> wrote:
>
> >a brightly-coloured bird
> >snaps a reddish spider
> >from its web among rotting berries;
> >
> >the silk is broken, disrupted;
> >the food is disabled, squelching
> >both sides of a half-closed beak
> >
> >neither bird nor animal shows emotion
> >========================================================================
>
> I've read this a number of times with admiration, Lawrence. Did you
> observe the incident or its aftermath? I like the way in which you
suggest
> that both the arachnid and the bird expired (or will do so), if I'm
> reading "squelching/both sides . . ." appropriately. Barry Alpert
>========================================================================
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