Hi Matt,
re: title ideas,after first read I thought Surprise,
or Surprises. If I'd seen it posted as Surprise I
would have been* surprised because the word, for me,
usually is used to set up an expectation of something
"good." So, you might not be keen on it, but that's
what "popped" for me, and I think that might be
powerful in this context so I thought I'd share it
with you. Also, I'd recommend that you change "it" to
"a" in the line:
and we wake to it white over. Since one
hope this helps
later
calaya
**********
Snow fell in the night, as they warned it might,
and we wake to it white over. Since one
she has clung on to every breath, and slowly
this green world slips beneath its shroud.
The traffic, the town, the sounds of this life
stilled and spent. My father's crying, baffled,
from the garden below the half-open window.
Only her pain, and our terror, loud.
Later, the headline in the evening paper:
It's January, it's cold and it's snowing,
so what's all the fuss?
But still it surprises us.
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