Hi Helen,
I like this a lot!
I read the first word as "And" -- and I really, really, like the way the
first line works! (That amazing word "afterwards"!)
The word "it" refers to the world on his back (in the grammer of the poem) I
think - but I struggle to remember that as I'm reading the poem! I'm envious
of how you've written it!
I like the one word title, too!
Bob
>From: Helen Clare <[log in to unmask]>
>Reply-To: The Pennine Poetry Works <[log in to unmask]>
>To: [log in to unmask]
>Subject: Sub: Strong
>Date: Mon, 19 Jan 2004 19:27:18 -0000
>
>
>Strong
>
>An afterwards I'd thrash across the satin spread
>hang my head beyond the bed, linger
>like a mermaid on a rock. And he'd be stiff
>as on a straight back chair - I'd wonder why
>he never slackened. I didn't see the chains,
>the world he carried on his back, how hard
>he'd labour just to keep it still. How the tides
>that took me woldn't touch, how easily
>he'd lift his burden high and let me drown.
>
>HC
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