> Hello Matt,
             Thanks for your further thoughts. The question of clarity vs opacity is a problem. I think what I enjoy most, both when I´m writing and when I´m reading is poetry which is obscure in the sense that it moves somewhere in the space between two or more possible interpretations and where interpretation consists not in identifying what the author really means, but in considering what emotions/ideas the tone and imagery of the poem evoke and then applying it to one´s  own experience. So I suppose ambiguous might be a better term.
I´ve taken your suggestion about the first `innocence´ on board. That phrase is now `in the playtimes´. Thanks for that pointer.


Best wishes,   Mike


> 
> It's a lot clearer after reading that, Mike, and it really set me thinking
> about just how subtle and indirect a poem can or should be. In principle,
> I'm not keen on poems that require a lot of explanation or background info,
> but in practice, I think I often enjoy reading them. I'm certainly guilty of
> writing them too.
> It's a very difficult balance - if you're too opaque, the reader might give
> up and go away, but if you remove everything that might not be understood,
> you run the risk of everybody's poems becoming bland and rather samey. I'm
> not at all sure which is the best way to go.
> But as regards this poem, I certainly wouldn't scrap it. There's plenty
> there worth keeping, IMO.
> Regards,
> Matt
> 
> 
> 
> -----Original Message-----
> From: The Pennine Poetry Works [mailto:[log in to unmask]] On Behalf
> Of Mike Horwood
> Sent: 17 December 2004 14:25
> To: [log in to unmask]
> Subject: Re: Making connections- Matt
> 
> 
> > Hello Matt,
>              Thanks for your comments. I´ll think over your point about
> `loss of innocence´. It does point the way rather heavy-handedly. If you´re
> interested in what I thought I was trying to do here, I´ve given some kind
> of explanation in the reply I´ve just posted with the subject `Making
> Connections - Christina´. If you´ve got any further thoughts after reading
> it I´d be interested to hear.
> 
> 
> 
> Best wishes,  Mike
> 
> 
>  
> > 
> > Hi Mike,
> > There's a lot I like about this, although I probably need to read it a 
> > few more times to make all the connections myself. I wasn't overly 
> > keen on the title though, and I'd lose the "in our innocence" in the 
> > first stanza. It signposts the way the poem is heading a bit too much.
> > Really good read though, IMO.
> > Regards,
> > Matt
> > 
> > -----Original Message-----
> > From: The Pennine Poetry Works [mailto:[log in to unmask]] On 
> > Behalf Of Mike Horwood
> > Sent: 16 December 2004 11:15
> > To: [log in to unmask]
> > Subject: New sub: Making connections
> > 
> > 
> > Hello Troops!
> > I´m getting really bogged down with this one. Some things about it I 
> > like, but I´m bothered about whether the connections are really being 
> > made here, and whether there are too many of them. Please assist a 
> > poet in distress (3 wives and a child to support, erm, no, that´s not 
> > right.....
> > 
> > 
> > Making Connections
> > 
> > Superb, I curve like a coat hook
> > in the cloakroom of my first school,
> > where, in our innocence, we used to swing,
> > two small hands clasped round the shaft,
> > knees drawn up, or dream of hoisting
> > a foe to leave him hanging helpless
> > as the Romans did. Six thousand
> > along the Appian Way, nailed
> > or tied to the woodwork.
> > 
> > Truly, we are hooked and forked,
> > designed to dovetail as smoothly
> > as the carpenter slots cross-joints.
> > With feet planted slightly apart
> > and hips a little forward, I pause
> > to glance through the window at a bird
> > with a worm twisting in its beak,
> > then tense my muscles. I bear against a weight
> > and pressure. I press against resistance.
> > 
> > We know how snugly the hook fits the worm,
> > how the worm slides down a gullet.
> > Yes, I think, it´s all tearing, impaling
> > and swallowing. So fishing, carpentry
> > and the knowledge that a man will twist
> > when a bird spears his eyeball
> > all have this in common,
> > this loss of innocence.
> > 
> > 
> > 
> > Mike
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> Northcliffe Retail or Northcliffe Accounting Center. This e-mail and any
> other files transmitted with it are confidential and solely for the use of
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