See further down for my respose...
>From: Gary Blankenship <[log in to unmask]>
>Reply-To: The Pennine Poetry Works <[log in to unmask]>
>To: [log in to unmask]
>Subject: Re: A River Transformed XIV: After Wang Wei's Lacquer Tree Garden
>(Bob
>Date: Tue, 19 Oct 2004 18:26:12 -0700
>
>Hi Gary,
>Like others i find the hand clapping lines disrupting in the poem (a tad
>hackneyed, perhaps). I can link it to the ancient stones you mention (ie
>your student is learning from what's been taught and said long ago) but it
>still stands out too much IMO.
>Bob
>Who's wondering, too, if the notes relate to your poem as well as to the
>four lines they follow...
>
>Bob, hackneyed is the reason the lines are they. They are the most common,
>most quoted zin lesson. I want their staleness in this place as a way of
>describing the self-taught student.
>
>Does he really understand the gate and oxen, the pottery koan - or is he
>mostly a fake?
>
>Thanks.
>
>Gary
It might be, Gary, that you need to help the reader see what you're doing a
bit more cearly... maybe help the reader see the intended irony of including
the lines.
Bob
>
>
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