Bob,
I think the 'rumble' here is the British 'jumble'.
Trans-Atlanticisms strike again?
Roger
----- Original Message -----
From: "Bob Cooper" <[log in to unmask]>
To: <[log in to unmask]>
Sent: Wednesday, September 08, 2004 1:28 AM
Subject: Re: New: The Foundation of a Grandfather's House
Hi Gary,
each time I read this I find myself wondering about the word rumble. I sort
of feel all that's come before in the poem is in silence - and then the
noises happen: rumble, chickens, a seagull. H'm, have you thought of
including some noise in the first two stanzas?
I, too, find the line: "boxes of words line rats' nest and sparrows."
difficult. How can boxes of words line sparrows? Do you mean "line rats
nests and sparrows nests"? If so, could the line say that?
Bob
Who's found his posts today have appeared well out of sequence and hours and
hours after they've been posted!
>From: Gary Blankenship <[log in to unmask]>
>Reply-To: The Pennine Poetry Works <[log in to unmask]>
>To: [log in to unmask]
>Subject: New: The Foundation of a Grandfather's House
>Date: Fri, 3 Sep 2004 06:58:41 -0700
>
>(The seventh in a series of transformations of Wang Wei's River Wang
>poems.)
>
>A River Transformed VII: After Wang Wei's Meng-Cheng Valley
>
>The Foundation of a Grandfather's House
>
>Nettles and wild roses block the front path,
>alder saplings sprout where the side porch stood.
>A toppled chimney's bricks point to northern hills,
>broken concrete towards the eastern sky.
>
>Baskets of memories have melted in the rain,
>boxes of words line rats' nest and sparrows.
>The shipping trunk might still sit among the debris,
>impossible to reach through briar thickets.
>
>Rebuilt? Sold? Left to run to riot,
>home for badgers and flea-infested alley cats?
>This rumble fit only for free-range chickens
>and storage for empty, unlined journals.
>
>A seagull feeds perched on a crumbling angel;
>corroded letters no longer tell who you were.
>
>*
>
>This is the first poem I've interpreted that I do not have a literal
>translation for (yet), so I offer a translation by the Barnstone's for
>comparison:
>
>I made my new home at Meng Wall.
>Old trees? Only some rotting willows.
>After me, who else will lodge here,
>aimlessly grieving for past owners?
>
>
>GO TO http://www.mindfirerenew.com/ THE BEST NEW ZINE ON THE WEB and to
>http://www.mindfirerenew.com/FireWeed/0904-front.html for our new monthly
>mini-zine. Poets for Peace.... ˇPoemas sí, balas no!
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