Shalom Catherine,
I like the theme of your poem. I would take a close look at the amount of
gerunds you are using.
kol tuv, Ryfkah
In a message dated 08/11/2004 4:01:11 PM, [log in to unmask] writes:
<< Comments welcome - please advise with neither - nor!
Drama Queen
All this strutting and fretting
and you don't even get a bit part
in this production.
Neither director, agent nor audience
watching in the dim-out
as we stumble through our lines.
I select scenes to replay
in these private screenings
only the lighting is yours.
Can you fill the gaps in the script
by studying my flush or pallor,
by reading my hands and eyes?
>>
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