Hi Matt,

Long lines are very effective sometimes, but they are a publisher's
nightmare.
If the lines will not fit in the printed page, where do you create the break
and overlap? Reducing the font size is not an option except in extreme
circumstances.

Roger


----- Original Message -----
From: "Merritt, Matt - Leic. Mercury" <[log in to unmask]>
To: <[log in to unmask]>
Sent: Wednesday, May 05, 2004 9:35 AM
Subject: Re: Some Suburban Midnight


> Hi Bob,
> Brilliant! Creates a mood beautifully, IMHO, and there are so many nice
> touches.
> "stars they never notice except on holiday
> when they glance up in the warmth of a barefooted instant" makes its point
> very subtly, but then the whole poem works that way.
> Like Arthur, I was a bit worried by "scatteredness" at first, but I've
> warmed to it now!
> I like the long lines too - both you and Grasshopper seem to have been
using
> them a lot lately, and it's encouraging me to use them rather more. I
think
> they work really well here - to me, the shorter early lines sound like the
> poet/narrator beginning to piece together his thoughts, before it all
comes
> together in more of an instinctve rush towards the end.
> Great read, thanks.
> Regards,
> Matt
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: The Pennine Poetry Works [mailto:[log in to unmask]] On Behalf
> Of Bob Cooper
> Sent: 04 May 2004 15:29
> To: [log in to unmask]
> Subject: Some Suburban Midnight
>
>
> THIS EMAIL HAS BEEN SWEPT FOR VIRUSES BY THE NORTHCLIFFE GROUP MAILSWEEPER
> SERVER.
>
> H'm, it seems quiet right now...
> So here's a kinda quiet poem for some C & C:
>
> Some Suburban Midnight
>
> And how many men are stood like this in their socks,
> bare legged as they shake then hang up their trousers,
> smooth what's draped on other hangers, then quietly
> close the wardrobe before peeping between curtains
> while their wives turn a page and muffle a yawn?
> Outside there are stars, countless stars,
> stars they never notice except on holiday
> when they glance up in the warmth of a barefooted instant perhaps
mentioning
> childhoods when they stared, as how many other children have stared,
amazed
> at their scatteredness, their distant sacredness. Soon they will lie with
> the light of their thoughts not realising that all they ever wanted is
here
> as it was before they looked up from some beach, as it was before they
> didn't look up, a blessing in the stillness of their dark bedroom right
now.
>
> Bob
>
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