Hi Frank, I haven't read what the others have said but to me it paints a
very visual and atmospheric picture at first of a man possiblly a down and
out walking in the early winter night but then the poem seems to change pace
so I hope you don't mind but I have fiddled a bit and omtted a few words.
But I do like the picture you potray and I get a feeling for the character,
Just needed a little editting I thought. BW Sally
>From: Frank <[log in to unmask]>
>Reply-To: The Pennine Poetry Works <[log in to unmask]>
>To: [log in to unmask]
>Subject: sub - change of seasons
>Date: Mon, 19 Apr 2004 22:48:52 +1000
>
>change of seasons
>
>he dresses himself
>in the first long coat
>of the cool season
>
>the weather has fallen
>the chill a drifting hover
>above the ground
>
>gloves
>a scarf
>the knitted woolen cap
>
>the deciduous footpaths
>a litter of brown leaves
>the sky
>fading finger-shadows
>of bare branches
>and disappearing cloud
>
>the first mist materialises
>with each exhaled breath
>as he walks
>hands in pockets
>along the streetscape
>of new night
>
>he is (as) empty
>as the feeling of the season
>
>~
>
>a bicycle flashes past
>all yellow reflections
>and strobe-light
>
>
>the dog of indifference
>sprays piss, paws the ground
>oblivious
>
>at the corner the light peering down
>is a loneliness he avoids
>by adherence to shadows
>
>why does the man-shape
>behind a glow of cigarette ember
>dally against the fence
>what purpose to its watching?
>
>move on
>
>~
>
>on the avenue of exposure
>there are no trees
>no cover
>
>here it is rapid steps
>and following shapes
>each drawn from the placement
>of his feet
>spreading out
that point to each available direction
>
>there is no help here
>
>he expected none
>
>
>
>~
>
>his shoulders have slumped
>the further he walks
>the closer he feels
>to the ground
>
>there is no comfort in these places
>
>above him
>the darkness is complete
>save for the twinkling lies
>of faded representatives
>
>they do not assist
>
>~
>
>in the light of a shopfront
>he draws his cap lower
>stops to look at the gaudy collection
>
>vacuum cleaners
>refrigeration
>a compact disk rack
>one silent wide-television
>
>
>there is confusion here
>
>move on
>
>a vacant block is home
>a blackened gutted shell
>that once sold yellow
>faux-leather divans
>reclining lounge wear
>
>an eyesore still
>
>~
>
>his nostrils are uncomfortable
>sensitised by the intake of cold air
>
>to wipe it would require
>extraction of hand from glove
>
>he sniffs
>
>turns the corner
>
>there is no point
>in stopping
>
>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
>
>The Book of Evenings is now available for purchase online. Check it out and
>a review of the book on the Tales of Faust webpage at www.talesoffaust.com
>
>While you're there, if you find something you like, take the time to
>nominate a poem for a future publication by the Tales of Faust publishing
>team.
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