Dear Bob,
Aha, no biggie. Actually the 'you' of the poem is something more particular
to the narrator - but I hoped it might suggest something more general. It's
about losing a loved one who dies young, and who always remains young...
Kind regards,
grasshopper
----- Original Message -----
From: "Bob Cooper" <[log in to unmask]>
To: <[log in to unmask]>
Sent: Friday, April 16, 2004 5:08 PM
Subject: Re: [THE-WORKS] New sub : Archery -Bob
Ooops!
I was skimming up the posts and should have read more closely, shouldn't
have mis-read like that!
Bob
>From: grasshopper <[log in to unmask]>
>Reply-To: The Pennine Poetry Works <[log in to unmask]>
>To: [log in to unmask]
>Subject: Re: New sub : Archery -Bob
>Date: Fri, 16 Apr 2004 16:28:48 +0100
>
>Dear Bob,
>Many thanks for your comments, but this poem isn't about Cupid -he didn't
>pack a long-bow. The clue to the identity of the 'you' in this poem is in
>the first line - it's someone who died young, - who isn't small and chubby
>...
>Kind regards,
> grasshopper
>
>----- Original Message -----
>From: "Bob Cooper" <[log in to unmask]>
>To: <[log in to unmask]>
>Sent: Friday, April 16, 2004 3:55 PM
>Subject: Re: [THE-WORKS] New sub : Archery (Sally, M)
>
>
>Hi Sally, Christina, grasshopper,
>
>Yeh, I'm with what you're getting at too, Christina! For me it's as if the
>poem's said something striking but in the last stanza it's as if it's
>floundering around trying to find an ending!
>The porcupine image really stands out too starkly and distracts.
>It might well be that readers can infer the pain, wounds, without them
>having to be described... Why else have the bones being shook at the chubby
>little menace to our feelings?
>Bob
>Who's seen plenty of plastic cupids but no plastic porcupines!
>And who's going to a reading tonight where the tickets cost £10! I don't
>think I've ever paid that much before... so I know of the pain of poetry!
>
>
> >From: Christina Fletcher <[log in to unmask]>
> >Reply-To: The Pennine Poetry Works <[log in to unmask]>
> >To: [log in to unmask]
> >Subject: Re: New sub : Archery (Sally, M)
> >Date: Fri, 16 Apr 2004 06:37:42 EDT
> >
> >Interesting how we all react differently to the same words, eh, Sally.
>It
> >gives me problems for several reasons. Using porcupined as a verb is
> >certainly
> >original but, for me, it sticks out (so to speak) as an invention and
>feels
> >artificial. It also conjures a very strong image of the animal in my
>mind.
> >Perhaps, if I'd ever been stabbed by a porcupine quill, I'd relate to the
> >pain
> >rather than the visual image, which is much more to do with the animal
> >itself
> >than the pain it might inflict. So I find it difficult to deal with this
> >after
> >the tremendously convincing, original bones/runes image. What the poem
> >leaves
> >me with at the moment is the business of playing with language and a
>rather
> >agitated little chap in the grass. Runes/bones leaves me with an
>emotion.
> >It's all horses for courses. Perhaps it's good to have such conflicting
> >reactions.
> >bw
> >c
> >
> > > Gosh I really liked the last two lines Christina as it sums up the
>pain
> >of
> > > the arrows entering the body metaphysically of course. A broken heart
>is
> >a
> > > gut feeling and the pain is almost physical. SallyJ
> >
>
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