> It´s only me....back again,
I just wanted to add, following on from Christina´s point here about the title, that I can see what she means and the title `Off´ would fit and be a good one, but I had read your original title as suggesting unrequited love which I take to be the subtext here and so I think it works in that sense.
Best wishes, Mike
> Lähettäjä: Christina Fletcher <[log in to unmask]>
> Päiväys: 2004/04/15 to PM 05:47:19 GMT+03:00
> Vastaanottaja: [log in to unmask]
> Aihe: Re: New sub returned to sender
>
> I did enjoy this, Sally but I'm not sure that I fully understood on account
> of the title. It could imply that the sender gets the stinking fish back and I
> rather doubt that's the intention. How about 'Gone Off' instead, or maybe
> even just 'Off'? Or something along those lines if that's what you mean. Or do
> you mean that you send something fresh only to have the same thing sent back
> in a less than fresh state? I don't think so on account of the penultimate
> line. What about deleting the fifth line and breaking the stanza on the fourth?
> The poem's addressed to the person you're sending the fish to and I think
> the reader would have fun working out what was going on. But oh, I do like it!
> More power to your pixels, Sally. Bravo!
> bw
> christina
>
> > Returned to sender
> >
> > It is Easter and I wanted to give you an egg
> > a chocolate one, wrapped in silver, tied with a ribbon of red
> > and for your breakfast, an egg, newly laid
> > still warm from the hen
> > But because I don't see you anymore
> > I will give you a fish instead
> > I bought one fresh from the market this morning
> > Its eyes are bright and its scales jeweled with sea
> > It smelled of oceans and coconut islands
> > when I sent it today
> > I wrapped it in foil with kisses and love
> > You should recieve it soon
> > But someone said you had gone away for a week.
> >
> > Sally james
>
>
>
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