Calaya, promising, but I wonder...Flash between costs
of living breakers
and funerals.Between politicians' stand up comedies.
Between mothers and daughters-feel the powers of pills
clinically proven to change urges.Flash: for fathers
and sons: refunds.
but I'm not sure parts work as in costs of living
breakers
and that the Flash: parts need a change in format -
indenting, S breaks, ?
Seems a bit long also.Smiles.
Gary
Glad to hear you hear, at least, a promise. I played
with several formats/line breaks, and finally went
with the one that most matched my breaths reading
aloud. Two writer friends, tho not poets, both read it
before I posted it and said it really sounded like a
performance piece- which I've never* done
consciously-I mean write a piece meaning it for
perofrmance. Anyway,I was aware when drafting the
original that mixing flash flood/rising waters images
with the flash/flash/flash of signs might not work.
Can I tie all that up with the Free-for-all Sale
sense...which is/was at the heart of the matter for
me? Dunno; plan another go at it in a bit, but may
need to let it rest. As always, thnaks for your
suggestions, either way.
happy day
calaya
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