Very potent start; I would look at the rest of the poem and tighten it a bit
with some strict editing.
Keep the poetry light shining - I like your daring.
kol tuv, Ryfkah
In a message dated 01.05.03 4:31:33 AM, [log in to unmask]
writes:
<< You tell me the earth is bleeding -
so what? The old bitch is in heat again,
forging a wake of blood-spots
as she whines at the sky. >>
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