Hi Sally,
"a half halo curl of wire..." is such a powerful phrase! It's so haunting to
say...
It's a really powerful poem. And I see that all the words except "halo" and
then "sharper" and "bayonet" are single syllables and brief to see yet
linger on the breath when they're said ("halo looks so short too!). The two
longer words that appear almost together don't distract either - they come
far enough down the poem not to be noticed.
It's well written!
It's also shoowing a lot of deep feeling many people can share!
Bob
>From: Sally James <[log in to unmask]>
>Reply-To: The Pennine Poetry Works <[log in to unmask]>
>To: [log in to unmask]
>Subject: New Sub poets exhibition
>Date: Mon, 27 Jan 2003 10:45:30 +0000
>
>War Poets Exhibition
>
>War to end all wars?
>
>a half halo curl of wire
>cries from the glass case
>black with trench dirt
>and dried blood
>it digs into me
>sharper than a bayonet
>the black thorns
>tear me to shreds
>like the poets words.
>
>Sally James
>
>
>
>_________________________________________________________________
>Worried what your kids see online? Protect them better with MSN 8
>http://join.msn.com/?page=features/parental&pgmarket=en-gb&XAPID=186&DI=1059
_________________________________________________________________
Worried what your kids see online? Protect them better with MSN 8
http://join.msn.com/?page=features/parental&pgmarket=en-gb&XAPID=186&DI=1059
|