Arthur, a good read but comments below. Mainly I wonder if a couplet form
would work:
Sun on blasted stone glows gold and clean
windows wink
white clouds bloom
high over me and move on (overhead)(this S doesn't have the umph of others,
though that may not be a bad thing)
the air’s clear and sharp and cold (no 's and first and)(clear and sharp the
same in this context?)
as a glass of Sauterne
trees by the memorial pruned to cups
bare now but budded
a pigeon displays his wings and boat
body on the blue
all their confusions of deed, stock and valuta
useless in dim vaults
heaped shell bar pearl (shells)
wadded wealth nor crass coinage
buys not one second of a morning rich
and sweet as this.
Thanks.
Gary
Jan Jenifer Lawrence at: http://gardawg.homestead.com/gardawg.html ---
Writer's Hood at http://www.writershood.com/... Poets for Peace.... ˇPoemas
sí, balas no!
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