Well, this proves the point about messages going missing, as I have received
no comments about Barbara's poem, -apart formone by Christina which
postdates this. To read them,I will have to do to the website.
  By the way, -a general point which I've often thought about- is it better
to crit a poem without reading anyone else's comments? I have a feeling it
is, or we may, in spite of ourselves, be influenced by those comments. It's
also quite hard, for instance,  to comment negatively on a poem that
everyone else has gushed about - but that's never stopped me-LOL!
Kind regards,
 grasshopper
----- Original Message -----
From: "Mike Horwood" <[log in to unmask]>
Sent: Thursday, January 23, 2003 7:37 AM
Subject: Re: [THE-WORKS] sub: I am on the hunt for you...


Hello Barbara,
              I´m afraid I have to dissent somewhat from all the praise that
this poem has drawn. It doesn´t work so well for me, and that is nothing to
do with how skilfully you have solved the formal problems of the style
you´ve chosen to write in, it has more to do with that very style. This, of
course, means that it is just a question of personal taste - some people
enjoy this style of poetry, others don´t. For example, most of the readers´
comments that I´ve looked at have complemnted your use of rhythm but for my
ear that rhythm is just too overbearing. I found the rhyming too insistent
also, especially when sentence structure needs to be bent to accommodate it.
Well, anything else I could add would just be saying the same thing, this is
not my style of poem, so I won´t extend the list. I hope you don´t think it
churlish of me to mention this. I just felt that it was worthwhile to voice
the other point of view.




Best wishes,   Mike



--- Alkuperäinen viesti ---

I would appreciate all comments and crits.

Thanks you,
Barbara Ostrander


I am on the Hunt for You


Where have all the cavaliers gone,
The war-horses and knights in armor white,
The explorers of the arctic chill,
And Vikings unafraid to fight?
Where are those men who found new worlds,
And sailed on rough uncharted seas,
Who dared to put wings on their backs
And take their dreams upon the breeze?
Where the cowboys who rode the plains,
The outlaws running hard and fast,
The priest who trekked through jungles deep,
And gladiators of the past?
Where the inventors that believed the dream
Enough to face the laughing crowd,
Those who fight dauntless hand to hand
And die to make their country proud?
And flying ore targets dense with fire,
Where are those fighter pilots true,
Those who would dare fly to the moon
Are strong and passionate men so few?

Where are the men to make me dream,
And in their heart deep passions hold,
And capturing mine refuse to blink,
I long for one to stand so bold.
So few I've met that I lose heart
Of finding all I long to know,
Do not ask first, just hold me tight
And let us take this dance real slow.

Our comfort zone, the place we live,
We are grown fat with summer's ease,
In doing so we die half way
And miss the chance to live and breathe.
The skin is soft, the answer slow,
I'm gone and no one cares at all,
I shake my head; there's no pursuit,
This passionlessness that makes us small.
Measuring consequence a million times,
We miss the edge of life we crave,
This adventure and heroic love
That causes us to rise up brave.

So count me with those hungry few
Who long to taste life all the way,
I care not what the end might bring,
I only care the game to play.
I will chose yes to everything
That comes my way, to make me strive,
I'm willing even yet to bleed
If just to prove I am alive.
So life come at me, I will not turn
Except to open arms out wide,
I want to feel the wind and rain
And swim out with the parting tide.

And all you men? this you should know,
If your heart is wild and fearless, too,
There are some who long for your deep touch
And I am on the hunt for you.

BBO
12/30/00