<< only a couch
> remote
> reruns
> and the light tap of keys
> as your bottom spreads
>
> and memories fade
> >> I would consider cutting this section, Gary, it just isn't up to the
real excellence of the beginning. Think about another ending or at least
remove "as your bottom spreads." It may be true, but it is completely out of tune
with the voice you have established here. Hope this helps, Sue
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