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Subject:

Re: New Sub: Not Her Type

From:

Bob Cooper <[log in to unmask]>

Reply-To:

The Pennine Poetry Works <[log in to unmask]>

Date:

Thu, 23 Oct 2003 16:09:33 +0000

Content-Type:

text/plain

Parts/Attachments:

Parts/Attachments

text/plain (64 lines)

Hi Helen,
Now this poem takes me to a world I rarely visit! But the world feels as
though it exists - tho I also get a feeling that the narrator (like me as a
reader) only glimpses what's there. But that's enough to make the last
comment work well for me.
I'm wondering if "Balls brothers" needs to be "Ball's Brothers" or something
like?
I'm also surprised by the sudden arrival of the statement, sort of tagged
onto the end of a stanza, perhaps for neatnes more than for meaning, "She
finds she cannot touch them." How essential is that phrase for the poem?
It's a contrast to the phrase, "It's a small thing she asks for." I sort of
read these two phrases, and the title, and wonder about the complexities of
what's going on in "her." (Which contrast to the more easily read
perspectives we get about the blokes she's with). Know what I mean?
Bob


>From: Helen Clare <[log in to unmask]>
>Reply-To: The Pennine Poetry Works <[log in to unmask]>
>To: [log in to unmask]
>Subject: New Sub: Not Her Type
>Date: Sun, 19 Oct 2003 08:09:57 +0100
>
>Not Her Type
>
>Overgrown school boys, their bottoms plumping
>pin-stripe, their side partings unconvincing.
>She's met a few at Balls brothers (which it seems
>is not like Yates' Wine Lodge after all).
>
>They speak in 'we's and of collateral
>and names, they order wine without checking
>the list, then fill her glass.  And she in tight jeans
>and cleavage and smoking too much.
>
>Rarely are they inclined to consider
>that capitalism is a dog biting its own arse,
>or that a nation at war holds its breath
>because it is trying to stop its soul escaping
>
>  - they push on with their project. Sex, after all
>is not a metaphor. Nothing is piggy-backed
>on their desire for a woman so unlike their wives
>or sisters. She finds she cannot touch them.
>
>Their surfaces are like egg shell. As babies
>they had no fontanelles. Its a small thing
>she asks for. A man she can dig her thumb into
>and still be holding something solid.
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>[log in to unmask]
>http://helenaclare.users.btopenworld.com
>07812 591 009

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