Hello Christina,
This is a great read, very original and inventive. Just a couple of things I wonder about; `flesh-sucking toes´ doesn´t quite convey a precise idea to me. The toes suck flesh? And then `tonguless´ in line 7. I think I know what you mean here,many species of frog appear to be tonguless at a glance. I mean there tongue isn´t easily visible. But tonguless, I think, they are not. Neither of this little quibbles disturbed my enjoyment of this intereesting poem, though.
Best wishes, Mike
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> Lähettäjä: Christina Fletcher <[log in to unmask]>
> Päiväys: 2003/10/21 ti PM 10:39:12 GMT+03:00
> Vastaanottaja: [log in to unmask]
> Aihe: New sub: The Tale of Leaping Heart (first draft)
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> The Tale of Leaping Heart
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> Shocked by heaving slime, at first
> I couldn't kiss him. But I grew fond
> of fat, flesh-sucking toes and hooded eyes --
> they blinked and sank into his skull
> with every mouthful. For six days I marvelled --
> at silence, stillness, sudden song, luminous
> underbelly greens, his tongueless greed.
> And since I'd lost disgust I'd no desire to change him.
> The seventh day he paled and writhed,
> twisting, tugging skin over his head,
> pulling it off like a suffocating sweater.
> He gobbled it whole and when he leapt away
> I gathered the last sloughed cells
> and pressed them to my lips.
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> christina fletcher
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