Hello Roger,
Regrettably, I am unacquainted with Sally's usual standard. As you note,
there are many types of poetry... I found the more colloquial quality of
free verse quite in keeping with the subject matter for this piece...
and while I think it a useful exercise for poets to practice writing in
form (in fact, necessary to their overall growth) I disagree that
formality in and of itself results in a better piece.


Roger Collett wrote

>Dean,
>
>I'll admit that the piece is prosey and not up to Sally's usual standard by
>a long way, but poems don't have to _say_ anything. They can be descriptive
>narratives. There are many types of poetry and when the poet is having a
>difficult time of it the prose thing tends to surface.
>Stick with it Sally, rewrite it in , maybe, a rhyming metric form and
>something better may surface.
>
>Roger.
>
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>
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