I´ve just read Bob´s comments and while I can see the point of his argument, I´d like to add that I read the first stanza differently. For me the indeterminacy of phrases like `At a certain level from the ground´ and `from time to time´. worked perfectly and reinforced what I had understood to be one theme of the poem. I took the chair in the poem to be as much metaphorical as real and my feeling is that making changes that bring the chair fully into the real world would detract from the poem. That´s how I read it, at least.
Best wishes, Mike
--- Alkuperäinen viesti ---
Hi James,
The 2nd and 3rd stanzas seem a lot more powerful than the first. I sense
part of that is to do with the first words they use "This is a chair" which
seem so strong, positive. I feel that, if the first stanza were written in
the same strong, assertive, tone (maybe starting with the words "This is a
chair that/which ..." the repetition would add to the poem. Could the first
stanza, instead of saying, "from time to time" actually mention specific
times "we all" sit in it (lovely inclusive and subtle word "all"!).
I mean, I have a chair for sighs, for giggles, for squirming in - which
might look to be the same chair to anyone else but it feels different when
I'm in a different mood. And I know, when I go to other people's homes I
subconsciously sit on the same chair if I can (and they do the same when
they come round to ours!). Then the last point of the poem takes me even
further out in how I see things! That's how the poem's working for me.
Oh yes, and I also like its sonnetness!
Bob
>From: James Bell <[log in to unmask]>
>Reply-To: The Pennine Poetry Works <[log in to unmask]>
>To: [log in to unmask]
>Subject: New sub:A Chair As A Fourteen Liner
>Date: Fri, 17 Jan 2003 08:37:57 +0000
>
>I must be going through a weird stage, though have not been indulging in
>Lemsip or opium or herbal enhancements of any kind. C&c would be very
>welcome.
>
>
>A CHAIR AS A FOURTEEN LINER
>
>At a certain level from the ground
>is a chair on which we all sit
>from time to time to park or reflect
>but mostly to rest our feet
>and ease the lumbar region from pain.
>
>This is a chair of many different shapes
>designed for a single functional purpose
>on which to sit though not to sleep.
>
>This is a chair from where to expect
>that its contact shares the contention
>you get at the show of emotion -
>will grip one moment then feel
>as if there is no chair there -
>a chair with only the function of air.
>
>
>
>bw
>James
>
>
>
>
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