Mike, I am grateful that you have made the effort and with an open and
receptive mind. This has brought you close to the intention and purpose of
the poem. I will try to explain later the principles underpinning its
structure.It is of course very experimental. I removed the punctuation
because I wanted the music to pipe its own stops. Again thanks and I hope
you might just as interested in the explanation later. Regards Arthur.
----- Original Message -----
From: "Mike Horwood" <[log in to unmask]>
To: <[log in to unmask]>
Sent: Thursday, May 15, 2003 8:07 AM
Subject: Re: New sub: Beyond a why


Hello Arthur,
             Well, this is a bit of a departure from your usual style, I
think. It requires a bit of unraveling and concentration from the reader but
it´s worth the effort. This is clearly a poem which the reader would be
mistaken in trying to `translate´ into literal everyday language but the
sound of some of your phrases is lovely and convey a sense or feeling. I
love the opening, `Beyond a why more distant than a hope´ has a wonderful
ring and although I can´t `explain´ what it `means´ it conveys a sense of
sadness. I love this way of using language in poetry so that literal meaning
is backgounded but the real sense attached to words still plays a part in
the poetic meaning. ( I put this very clumsily, but I know what I mean and I
hope you get the idea.) I think this way of using language is what we all
try to do to some extent and some more than others, depending on their style
and it´s difficult to bring off without the whole thing descending into a
chaotic jumble. I feel you´ve brought it off here. There are other phrases I
really enjoyed - `shook....poetry from the rack and shock of words´, `memory
more close than breath of life´, `the slender passage of an hour´.
There was one place where I wonder if you´ve departed perhaps
unintentionally from standard usage - it jarred a bit with me - here, `far
blither than perhaps that found succour´.
On first reading I thought you were loading the dice against yourself by
dispensing with punctuation, but I have come to feel that you were right to
do so. The phrases flow so musically.
The tone is all so sad and wistful until the end when you bring in the
optimistic note. I really like this, Arthur.



Best wishes,   Mike




--- Alkuperäinen viesti ---
                                 Beyond a why.

Beyond a why more distant than a hope before a love far sooner than forget
shook starlight from the flare of doves and poetry from the rack and shock
of words there was a memory more close than breath of a life far blither
than perhaps that found succour in the soft obliterations of the snow and
silence in the slender passage of an hour.
After a maybe more sudden than a death a wish more subtle than despite knew
wisdom in the admonitions of the clock and splendour in the terrors of the
night far better this sometime than those nevers of despair rather an ocean
than an age and so do not bend to hear the gloomy chuggings of the heart but
fill the days with all the laving jubilations of the light.