Hello Arthur! I think I have more difficulty writing free verse than
metrical poetry. I seem to find it more difficult to establish what the
subject is. I am glad that you took a moment to share your own inquiry
into the poem, e.g. that you considered that it might be a red hair
ribbon, etc. I think you accurately identified phrases that were
intended to lead the reader toward the metaphorical reading, but alas I
have left it too hazy, apparently. Too much paring. Thanks for your
feedback about "ballroom" and about "dirt": I hadn't thought of that
problem. Thanks again Arthur!

Hello Mike!

> It [telliness] may well be a fault but how to define the nature of the
> beast and identify it when it rears its head is what I find not so
> simple.

I sympathize completely. Reportage, telliness, how to go beyond the
imagery to 'tell' the reader something without leaving the art form,
these are matters that interest me as well. I can once again allude to
Akhmatova. Her poems, I insist, are not telly, though they may seem to
be so. She is a good example of how to be artful about going beyond the
imagery of the poem and stating, without being flat about it, some
larger idea. Have a look at her work sometime, with a view to exploring
this issue. And best of luck with your writing.

Carl