Thanks for the read Mike and for taking time to comment. The apparent move
from the shore to elsewhere is the train of thought set into motion by "
grey remembered eyes" and smoothness, a memory of a love, and then, the
fault in the 'perfection' of the pebble, reminds of the fault in the love,
the decline of all things, love included, from perfection to corruption, is
inherent in the 'seed' , first cause. A jaundiced point of view perhaps,
cynical but reality I would opine.The casting of the stone is to start over.
I am sorry this is not clear in the poem. I will look at it again.Arthur.
----- Original Message -----
From: "Mike Horwood" <[log in to unmask]>
To: <[log in to unmask]>
Sent: Thursday, April 03, 2003 9:51 AM
Subject: Re: New sub: Pebble


Hello Arthur,
             I like the description in this piece very much, S1 and S2
especially. I also like the idea of the colouring of the stone triggering a
memory of someone known earlier. I didn´t so much like the word `lodges´ -
the final word in S6. What about `catches´ or is that a bit clichéd? I also
didn´t really see what point you were making with `the fruit´s  corruption´.
It may be my obtuseness but this idea felt out of place in the poem. With
the final stanza I felt I was back in the `real´ poem again. Hope this is
useful.


Best wishes,   Mike





--- Alkuperäinen viesti ---
Pebble.

The sea uncurls
shines and shoots
like hot solder
up the slope of beach.

The sand springs
tines of grasses,
wind-curved
to rake the air.

This stone, found perfect.
I toss to tumble
through the flare of sky.
It flies a moment

then smacks back
into my palm.
My fingers stroke
the sea-smoothed skin.

Grey as remembered eyes,
flecked and freckled,
smooth as the skin
on the inside of her arm.

Exploring fingers
discover a scar
a blemish too small
for eye, but the nail lodges.

All things are marred.
The fruit?s corruption?s
inherent in the seed.
I cast it

back into the scour
and rinse of the sea.
A bright flower
of shining water blooms.