James, if poems can be poems, so can crap. I like S2 best, cleaner than 1
to me (no pun intended). Here
Now, downriver at mid-day
heat has burnt away the mist,
is more of a distant haze.
I would add a comma after mid-day to keep it and is more more together or
move heat has up to start the line.
Thanks.
Gary
IF MY MAIL BOUNCES, MAIL [log in to unmask] AS AN ALTERNATIVE.....March
Margaret Hodge and Gary poems for kids at:
http://gardawg.homestead.com/gardawg.html --- Writer's Hood at
http://www.writershood.com/..... Poets for Peace.... ˇPoemas sí, balas no!
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