Thanks for this Colin. This is about 2nd draft so you've paved the way for
the third.



bw
James





>From: Colin dewar <[log in to unmask]>
>Reply-To: The Pennine Poetry Works <[log in to unmask]>
>To: [log in to unmask]
>Subject: Re: New sub: Taw
>Date: Sun, 23 Mar 2003 10:59:33 -0000
>
>James,
>
>See below. Details aside I like the approximation of the flow of time and
>the flow of the river.
>
>Colin
>
>
>----- Original Message -----
>From: "James Bell" <[log in to unmask]>
>To: <[log in to unmask]>
>Sent: Saturday, March 22, 2003 12:36 PM
>Subject: New sub: Taw
>
>
> > Another river poem.
> >
> > TAW
> >
> > It's been a long time
> > and only now I choose to call
> > this river Taw by name
> > and in the word find the DELETE THE depths
> > of its DELETE ITS ancient origins before hunmanitySPELLING
> > as it took a way
> > through old forest and hills
> > uncontaminated by silage from fieldsDELETE FROM FIELDS
> > flood barriers and quays
> > arranged by hands eager to control
> > the habits of nature.
> >
> > Taw is silently flowing
> > or strong and dark though means nothing
> > to the birds whose ancestors
> > bred and fed here before human traffic
> > chose a name after the last time of DELETE TIME OF ice
> > and in the time of forest -
> > even now there is change
> > as I watch dry sand blown
> > across the sandbar following some design
> > of nature that refines its flatness
> > refrms SPELLING its bank
> > the only final control
> > over this silently flowing that may flow
> > beyond the woods
> > and those anxious
> > those striving
> > those warring.
> >
>SOME REDUNDANCY THROUGHOUT BUT ESP SO TOWARDS END: THE ONLY FINAL CONTROL
>OVER THIS SILENTLY FLOWING THAT MAY FLOW- I CAN'T GET THE SENSE OF THIS TO
>SUGGEST A CORRECTION
> >
> >
> > bw
> > James
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > _________________________________________________________________
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> >
> >


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