Hi Arthur,
"Aeroplanes..."
Yeh, I guess the words we use may have our own personal histories that
other's don't share. I often still call the platic box I've just been
listening too "the wireless" but I feel, in a piece of writing, if I'm
trying to give a sense of something very up to date I'd have to chose a
contemporary word.
So, I'd suggest that the TV may be seen to "gleam" and not flicker (and the
flowers, too, can gleam in sunlight). Gleam is a stronger, perhaps more
ominous, word as well - and it feels a more contemporary description of a TV
screen.
And, with Guernica, I must admit I haven't focused on the backdrop to the
speeches at the UN (and I'd actually thought the Guernica painting was no
longer in New York and had returned to Spain!).
If the poem, then, is (as Trish read it) to refer far more to 3 days earlier
this week - and not to any three days in history - it might be a date may be
needed either in the title or beneath the poem... I'd wondered if it was
relating directly to today but had dismissed that thought because of the
words I read and the point that Bush was saying the deadline was "48 hours."
I guess I'm thinking of minor adjustments that may help the poem make its
own way in the world.
Bob
>From: arthur seeley <[log in to unmask]>
>Reply-To: The Pennine Poetry Works <[log in to unmask]>
>To: [log in to unmask]
>Subject: Re: New Sub: Only three days to go
>Date: Tue, 18 Mar 2003 18:28:44 -0000
>
>Guernica is the painting all the members of the Security Council seem to
>walk past as they enter the chamber. Quite appropriate I thought. It might
>be me Bob but I still get on board an aeroplane, never yet a jet, sometimes
>a plane and the only time I called them aircraft was when I mended the
>electrics on them during my service. The telly has always been the telly
>since I first saw one and and the remote control in our house is known as
>the 'brodler'. The joys of language!
>Thanks for the read . Arthur.
>----- Original Message -----
>From: "Bob Cooper" <[log in to unmask]>
>To: <[log in to unmask]>
>Sent: Tuesday, March 18, 2003 5:07 PM
>Subject: Re: New Sub: Only three days to go
>
>
> > Hi Arthur,
> > A real 1930s, 1940s, feel to this! Words like aeroplanes (and not the
>modern
> > words jets, or aircraft, or planes) and the reference to Guernica, and
>the
> > hint at Dylan Thomas's poem that has a green fuse! And yet the word
>"telly"
> > is such a contemporary word! (But the picture is flickering - so it
>could
>be
> > a TV of years ago... H'm, I'm now struggling to try and remember when
>the
> > word "telly" became the norm - like wirelss, radio, trannie, tuner -
>each
> > word has a time when it was used. (It could be that "telly", tho,
>belongs
> > alongside "aeroplanes" - I'm not sure... I've just checked in the
>earliest
> > dictionary I have with the word "television" (printed 1959) and "telly"
> > doesn't appear. But it's not good at recording slang...)
> > Another point... Ha! I'm reminded of some work I did in a Primary School
>in
> > the previous Gulf War where we got a huge picture of Picasso's Guernica
> > (more than 6 foot tall and goodness knows how long!) and let the
>children
> > explore the enormity of what Picasso had painted. In what they said as
>they
> > stood and looked they were learning a lot...
> > But your association of the rituals connected with spring (seed trays
> > hinting at planting things), the wild flowers already in flower, and the
> > doves possibly in some courtship ritual, the sparrows (I imagine) nest
> > building, gives much a much darker appreciation of how war is built into
>the
> > world's agenda. It's a frightening thought - even when you say "I pass"
> > those two words can't imply reaching anything different because, in the
>last
> > phrases of each stanza, you infer that one needs the same concluding
>words
> > as the other!
> > But I recognise the total replication in each stanza - the words and
> > postures of the pontiffs and tyrants echoed by the fuse, and the old
> > small-screened TV, 14 inch in our house!, being compared to a seed tray
>are
> > clever comparative thoughts!
> > Bob
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > >From: arthur seeley <[log in to unmask]>
> > >Reply-To: The Pennine Poetry Works <[log in to unmask]>
> > >To: [log in to unmask]
> > >Subject: New Sub: Only three days to go
> > >Date: Tue, 18 Mar 2003 08:50:33 -0000
> > >
> > > Only three days to go.
> > >
> > >The telly mumbles in the downstairs room
> > >auntie being sombre, commentators pontificate,
> > >pontiffs comment, tyrants strut,
> > >pictures flicker as I pass, flags, Guernica,
> > >aeroplanes, comings and goings,
> > >paraphernalia of preparation.
> > >
> > >The collared doves croon to each other,
> > >seed trays in the shed, robin rustles in the hedge,
> > >deep pressures force the fuse,
> > >snowdrops flicker as I pass, crocuses, daffodils,
> > >sparrows , coming and going,
> > >paraphernalia of preparation.
> >
> >
> > _________________________________________________________________
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> >
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