Hi Gary,
I seem to be doing this today to people's poems but this one doesn't grab
me. It's too contrived, to neat and not left to the chance of your own
words. Take it to pieces and start again. You are a better poet than this.
bw
James
>From: Gary Blankenship <[log in to unmask]>
>Reply-To: The Pennine Poetry Works <[log in to unmask]>
>To: [log in to unmask]
>Subject: The Secure Selection of Colors
>Date: Thu, 20 Feb 2003 14:25:11 -0800
>
>The Secure Selection of Colors
>
>(orange alert a lighter shade of brown)
>
>Tangerine is too red,
>a reminder of the height of the Cold War
>when apocalypse loomed
>as large as a Texas ruby grapefruit
>ninety miles from the coast.
>
>Peach too pale
>to hold the fear we feel;
>beet too blood dark
>to allow us to continue our lives
>as if nothing had happened
>for they've won if we don't
> go on
>as if nothing has happened.
>
>Pumpkin is as American
>as apple pie, home-grown,
> honest,
>if we ignore the nagging doubt
>we squashed the pumpkin-eaters
>and no longer can afford green peppers
>let alone yellow.
>
>(orange fades to gray)
>
>Feb CE Chaffin, Celebrations and Blessings at:
>http://gardawg.homestead.com/gardawg.html --- Writer's Hood at
>http://www.writershood.com/... Poets for Peace.... ˇPoemas sí, balas no!
_________________________________________________________________
Surf together with new Shared Browsing
http://join.msn.com/?page=features/browse&pgmarket=en-gb&XAPID=74&DI=1059
|