Rebecca:
"It is also obvious how you do not question yourself, perhaps you were
sexist with this woman because she was more
intelligent, more intellectually challenging, more of a writer, more
well-known, had more grants, perhaps you had the hots for
her, etc., etc, for attitudes like sexism and racism emerge when one is more
involved or more at risk."
I do feel a need to adumbrate my response to this statement of yours,
although I'd emphasise there is no rancour in this. Let's begin:
on a personal level the woman concerned is someone I'd enjoyed a deeply
mutually supportive, innocent, and happy friendship for some time, which had
no hint of sexual impropriety to it. As far as I know the reason for her
charge of sexism originated in the fact that I visited her home on a day
when she'd had a tremendous row with her sister, a row which had nothing to
do with me, it eventuated the accusation and mutual acquaintances are as
bewildered as I am about it.
I did notice, on self-questioning, that there were a couple of occasions on
which I talked over her, she's quite petite and I couldn't always hear what
she was saying, as in private she talks in a small voice, I was horrified at
myself on the occasions, not just afterwards, but felt too embarrassed to
explain to her. That's about what I mean by being 'guilty of sexism' myself.
In respect of grants, status in the literary community etc, I'd like to make
clear that my anger is directed at particular circumstances in the area in
which I live, I did forward a post to illustrate how mind-dead the
'official' scene is here, resources are very limited hereabouts and a small
number of people make sure they control them, this allied with an impulse to
keep others out. It certainly isn't concerned with writers elsewhere.
All the Best
Dave
David Bircumshaw
Leicester, England
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