Hi Cara,
I like this very much. It shows beautifully clashes in cultural approach to
death and the widow's experience here. The Laura foil is excellent and not
an archetypal drawing but a formed character. The form of the poem is fine
in that it moves between the two distances and demonstrates the gaps. The
poem gathers momentum as it goes on. I was a little worried by the line
endings in the first stanza and felt they were often arbitrary then felt as
I went on that this was not the case and that the scene you were showing was
in the process of forming. A strength rather than a weakness. Only quibble
was the first line of the second stanza and thought perhaps: "the woman
edges closer". Fine work.
bw
James
>From: cara may <[log in to unmask]>
>Reply-To: The Pennine Poetry Works <[log in to unmask]>
>To: [log in to unmask]
>Subject: New Sub: In the Victoria Quarter
>Date: Fri, 22 Feb 2002 14:24:24 +0000
>
>-- In the Victoria Quarter
>
>
>
> The ceiling, reputed to be
> the largest stained-glass ceiling in Europe;
> the sculptured bench, stapled to the
> mosaic floor;
> Laura, knees together,
> elbows close to her ribs,
> eating her vegan
> sandwich;
> next to her the woman,
> with the scarf, hat
> jacket, shoes,
> disjointed statements
> of former fashion;
>
> the woman edging slightly
> closer;
> Laura brushing crumbs
> from her lap;
> the woman speaking
> as though she has
> never been silent;
> 'I am a widow,' she says,
> 'I came from Athens
> forty years ago
> and now
> I am a widow.
> When my husband was alive
>
> we had friends,
> made merry.
> Now I am a widow
> they no longer come
> to my house.
> I do not understand
> In Greece it is not so:
> women, those who are widows,
> are cared for
> not left alone.
> I am a neglected widow,
> in England.'
> The brown age-spots
> stand proud on her face and hands.
>
> Laura folds the paper bag
> to trap the rest of the crumbs.
> 'Perhaps,' she says 'they are
> embarrassed.'
> 'Perhaps,' she says, 'they do
> not like to intrude.'
> 'Perhaps,' she says, 'they are
> waiting for you
> to make the first move.'
> The widow pleats her lip,
> pinches the fabric of her skirt,
> does not agree.
>
> 'I'm sorry. I must go,' says Laura.
> 'I have an appointment.'
>
> This happens to be true though
> each of them is uneasy
> that it had to be said.
>
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bw
James
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