Hi Gary,
I like all the poem but find the "looming large" repetition intrusive. I'd
say better without though I understand you are trying to get the motion of
the loom in the poem.
bw
James
>From: garydawg <[log in to unmask]>
>Reply-To: The Pennine Poetry Works <[log in to unmask]>
>To: [log in to unmask]
>Subject: New: Looms
>Date: Wed, 6 Feb 2002 11:04:26 -0800
>
>A bit silly, written for a member of the live workshop, who also weaves
>with
>a group called The Small Loom Ladies, the looms small of course. The live
>workshop decided to do a loom poem for her, maybe a loomrick, pantaloom,
>villaloom, or plain patterned weave as here.
>
>Looms
>
>At the cusp of night,
>the moon's luminescence
>competes with artificial luminaries
>to light the weaver's way.
>
>looming large
>
>With the lightest touch,
>the small loom ladies lumber
>across the moors
>to join the weaver's weft.
>
>looming large
>
>In the dark of night,
>the moon looms large,
>loons and lambs laugh
>when the weavers go their way.
>
>looming large
>
>With great finesse,
>the small loom ladies loosen
>knots to braid bands
>for coat and shawl.
>
>looming large
>
>At the end of night,
>the moon looks thin,
>loathe to leave
>until the weavers go away.
>
>looming large
>
>The small looms are put away,
>fabric warped and woofed,
>until the moon is new
>the ladies weave alone.
>
>
>Feb guest is TE Ballard and Gar does garbage at:
>http://gardawg.homestead.com/gardawg.html,
>
>
>
>Poets for Peace. ˇPoemas sí, balas no!
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