let us revise their adolescent dream
to swell a progress start a scene or two
and be unlikely puzzles matched to win
a south sea bubble, time-share of desire
P-P, well done, esp the start, but I trip a bit on the above. The middle
reads choppy to me, a bit rough. Maybe something like:
let us revise their adolescent dream
to swell progress and start a scene or two
unlikely puzzles matched to win
south sea bubbles, time-share of desire
Or something else altogether.
Thanks.
Gary
January guest Nat at: http://gardawg.homestead.com/gardawg.html,
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Poets for Peace. ˇPoemas sí, balas no!
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