Thankyou Bob Thankyou James Thankyou Perpetua-You
have all touched on the words,phrases, concepts about
which I had reservations.
'chides': This is not currently in Northern(?- we're
pretty mixed even here) speech according to my little
straw poll in our local library. I think my own vocab
is idiosyncratic for various reasons.  I do wonder,
however, whether there isn't a case for revivifying
some such words.  I'm not being defensive, honest:
I'll happily think of another.

'his closing time': I was not truly happy about the
reverberations of this word.  Yes the man is the one
who is in charge of the tip. I guess the point about
its being near to his closing time is that there is
far less chance of any one else coming along to
restore the place to being a little more public and
(?)'safe'.

'without a shown self': this is, conceptually, a
little weak, I agree, Perpetua. The way he remembers
his visitors; attempts to discipline them; writes
notices on his skip and his dog-ownership all say
things about him. In his conversation he hides behind
the dog and its doings. In essential things I know
nothing of him.
Thanks for your reading and appreciation, cheers, cara

-- Bob Cooper <[log in to unmask]> wrote: >
Hi cara
> Now this is something that makes my mind wander in
> the way good poems do.
> (but 1st. a response to James' comment - I don't
> know who (dare) say you
> can't write a poem about a Dump! dare anyone be as
> ignorant as that?)
>
> ... and the poem cara. I'm there. I can feel what I
> sense the writer must
> feel in the poem... a kind of (I hope it doesn't
> show) nervousness about
> what may happen. That's well caught. (And is it that
> "chide" is still in
> Northern parlance? and possibly, now, isn't a
> natural-thought-to-use word
> elsewhere?)
> The one word that I never noticed, until I'd read
> the poem a few times, was
> the word "his" in the phrase "his closing time" in
> the last line. I always
> tend to think of the phrase "closing time" in
> relation to pubs anyway! But I
> sense you're meaning it differently. I'm also
> interpreting it in a variety
> of ways... (I'm guessing that the guy is the one who
> works at the dump,
> that's he's the one responsible for closing it...
> and then my other
> sentiments, and interpretations, are following that
> assumption).
> Bob
>
>
> >From: James Bell <[log in to unmask]>
> >Reply-To: The Pennine Poetry Works
> <[log in to unmask]>
> >To: [log in to unmask]
> >Subject: Re: New sub:Dramatis Persona
> >Date: Tue, 22 Jan 2002 08:40:39 +0000
> >
> >Hi Cara,
> >Who says you can't write a poem about going to the
> dump. The terse school
> >of
> >dialogue writing would suggest you rid yourself of
> "he chides", otherwise
> >fine.
> >bw
> >James
> >
> >
> >>From: cara may <[log in to unmask]>
> >>Reply-To: The Pennine Poetry Works
> <[log in to unmask]>
> >>To: [log in to unmask]
> >>Subject: New sub:Dramatis Persona
> >>Date: Mon, 21 Jan 2002 16:55:11 +0000
> >>
> >>--              Dramatis Persona
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >>        I see the pet dog first
> >>        He noses and waddles
> >>        Then his master follows
> >>        'You've cut it fine again' he chides
> >>        I laugh, agree
> >>        'He's been chasing rabbits'
> >>        he says, as before and before
> >>        'Only he's getting too old and too slow
> >>        Had a good day though'
> >>
> >>        I've been here
> >>        in this gaunt one-time quarry
> >>        on my own, off-loading
> >>        garden refuse into the skip
> >>        marked 'This one and no other'
> >>
> >>        I'm back in my car now
> >>        my wary eyes upon
> >>        this man without a shown self
> >>        who may suddenly opt to play
> >>        victim, rogue or villain
> >>        or who knows which of the Humours
> >>        on the stage
> >>        of this lonely amphitheatre
> >>
> >>        I smile and thank
> >>        through the open window
> >>        slide away
> >>        from any possible performance
> >>        two minutes to spare
> >>        before his closing time
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >>cara                                 january 2002
> >>
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> >
> >
> >
> >bw
> >James
> >
> >
>
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