In a message dated 01/18/2002 2:58:51 AM Central Standard Time,
[log in to unmask] writes:
<< A little worried
about the slightly elevated and archaic language at times. It works but
would be better modulated and give the poem a more contemporary presence and
therefore relevance. >> I looked back for archaic language and couldn't
find any except perhaps "naught." I could perhaps change that. The poem
does seem elevated in style and tone, but I didn't want another poem just
then for what I envisioned as a full-blown damask rose standing with
raindrops glistening on each petal and the sun coming through. I do not
defend the poem though it sounds as if I do. I wanted the reader to see the
rose and to experience joy in existence. That is all. Next time I will
present something more contemporary perhaps for contrast. Thanks for your
comments.
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