Hi Grasshopper,
Long time, no crit :)
I liked the tongue in cheek quality. Loved the rhymes which is unusual for
me. They seem to suit the mood of the piece. Tantivvy is a great title
although I can't find any definition of the word, apart from some equestrian
centre in Scotland has a "Tantivvy one-mile race course." Would love to know
the root of the word. Some suggs:
> Tantivvy
>
> Hark, tantivvy on the breeze
> stirs our ancient memories; ## great rhyme.
> The baying of a pack of hounds,
> ## intentional stanza break here?
> one of earth's most glorious sounds.
> I see pink men in full brave cry
> and know the fox must love to die.
> Let 's raise the ruby stirrup cup
> and toast to Reynard's ripping-up. ## great injection of humour here.
> No more honorable employment ## this is the only line that doesn't scan
for my syllabically, but maybe I've been in the states too long.
> than to kill with sweet enjoyment.
> Hark, tantivvy on the breeze:
> Heaven is made of such as these. ## days such as these?
>
> grasshopper
Bunny
"Sometimes a poem about a fish is just that - a poem about a fish."
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