a charming 'little song' with a classic theme
I'm not sure how to pronounce 'visora', but I would stress the 'or' sound,
which tramples on my iambics a bit - I also have a bit of a rhythm problem
with line 5
I'm not sure about the focus
'one blossom at a time' suggest something of parsimony - a careful doling
out of riches coin by coin - but this theme doesn't seem to be carried on
Easter - resurrection - lost at the height of summer
I'm not educated in botany - but the visora is almost a potential focus in
itself - the hardening that comes through early loss
I feel as if the first stanza is a Pandora's box of possibilities that gets
diverted into something a little tame and rather cliched and the last half
line suggests you regret not taking this up more deeply.
Terri )O(
-----Original Message-----
From: The Pennine Poetry Works [mailto:[log in to unmask]]On
Behalf Of Gary B
Sent: 08 July 2002 03:27
To: [log in to unmask]
Subject: Hibiscus Blooms Drop to the Floor
Hibiscus Blooms Drop to the Floor
Hibiscus shows one blossom at a time;
the Easter cactus sheds in late July.
A visora grows lengthy double spines
from drops of sap that weep as weak buds die.
My wife's to raise, a casual grower's try-
exotics far from where they first succeed.
I consider them pleasing to my eye,
but I admire the ordinary weed:
A golden poppy, thistle gone to seed,
a foxglove's trumpet, winter dandelion,
buttercup's yellow, honeyed fireweed,
and many more made plain by God's design.
As rose and yarrow brown in autumn rain,
The year departs. And did we lose or gain?
July Stazja and new Gary at: http://gardawg.homestead.com/gardawg.html
*New* Wild/Eliot Hyperpoem at: http://wildhyper.homestead.com/front.html
Poets for Peace. ˇPoemas sí, balas no!
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