Bob, interesting story, a bit prosey. I'm betting though you can do this in
shorter, more even count. I see 15 to 18, but can see it in 12 and much
tighter. I've started but am lazy today, so the rest is yours if you care
to.
Continuity. I can see the time being a bit longish. The fumble for fags
and lighting could take enough time to get your chips if the stand not
crowded.
Thanks.
Gary
He fell into me as, well lit, we swayed off the bus
Sandra caught him as we stopped singing and I swore
as she waltzed him nearer the chip shop, lowered him onto a bollard
where he struggled to get out his fags, then took one of Sandra's, lit it
while she smiled, spoke softly, until he leaned forward, belched loudly,
and puked all over her shoes. She stepped to one side, still held him,
rubbed his back, held his forehead, and crooned as if soothing a child
while I just ate my fish with the rest until I tried to tug her away.
But, *Fuck you Bob,* she says, *last month someone did this for me -
said the same had happened to him - so, by Christ, I'm handing it on.*
Bob Cooper
June Thomas and new Gar trash at: http://gardawg.homestead.com/gardawg.html
*New* Wild/Eliot Hyperpoem at: http://wildhyper.homestead.com/front.html
Poets for Peace. ˇPoemas sí, balas no!
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