Hi Frank,

I found the start a little over prosaic then the poem really gathered
momentum as the lines broke up with the language misunderstandings. Maybe a
little work on the early parts and its fine.

bw
James


>From: Frank Faust <[log in to unmask]>
>Reply-To: The Pennine Poetry Works <[log in to unmask]>
>To: [log in to unmask]
>Subject: sub - buying cucumbers
>Date: Thu, 3 Jan 2002 08:49:45 +1100
>
>djuro i djuka were cousins
>raised in neighbouring villages
>where they grew to be men
>did their time in the army
>started their families
>emigrated to germany for awhile
>had their second children -
>hamburg and bremmen
>came to australia to stay
>
>djuka lived in the city
>with so many others from the old country
>assembly workers at ford
>or at the chocolate factory
>or running the local shop
>or finding work as a boilermaker
>talking croatian with a pole
>german with a lat
>
>djuro went to a small town in the sticks
>talking handsigns with the boss
>stumbling phrases at the butcher
>keeping the old language for home
>learning wog english to get bread
>
>djuka said it was bullshit
>djuro said no     it was true
>djuka said he could get whatever he wanted
>djuro said no     its different in a small town
>djuka said come on     let's do it
>djuro says ok
>
>escoos mi      ai wont koo-kom-berrs plis
>'ey?
>ai wont koo-kom-berrs     pointing to a shelf
>sorry     what do you want?
>koo-kom-berrs
>george     can you help     what does he want?
>djuro says     yes norm      I think he wants kewcumbers
>
>norm turns around and gets a bottle of gherkins
>produce of Croatia
>
>why didn't you say so mate?
>
>~
>
>Frank
>
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bw
James


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