have you posted this before?
It's just I remember reading something quite like it - though this feels
smoother.
my only suggestion, regarding this technically superb poem, relates to these
lines
is not the way the passing-bells pretend
> that ring with falsehood, sonorous and slow.
The first is great - I like the allusion to Owen, the alliteration, but I
feel that the first half of the second merely repeats these ideas
(bells-ring and falsehoods-pretend). I'm sure you could find some more
interesting way to use these syllables?
Good one
Terri )O(
----- Original Message -----
From: "David Anthony" <[log in to unmask]>
To: <[log in to unmask]>
Sent: Saturday, March 02, 2002 2:54 PM
Subject: Is This the Proper Way?
> Is This the Proper Way?
> (in memory of M M)
>
> I knew you well and thought you were a friend,
> and yet you gave no sign you meant to go.
> Is this the proper way for it to end?
>
> The hardest thing for me to comprehend
> was why you failed to say goodbye, although
> I knew you well and thought you were a friend,
>
> and never doubted that I could depend
> on you. To my regret it was not so.
> Is this the proper way--for it to end
>
> so brusquely? I had always meant to spend
> more time with you. It was a bitter blow
> from one I knew, and thought of as a friend.
>
> I would have stood beside you to defend
> against the fear, though all I really know
> is this: the proper way for it to end
>
> is not the way the passing-bells pretend
> that ring with falsehood, sonorous and slow.
> There was no proper way for it to end
> for you, who left me, though you were a friend.
>
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