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Dave
David Bircumshaw
Leicester, England
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----- Original Message -----
From: "Alison Croggon" <[log in to unmask]>
To: <[log in to unmask]>
Sent: Thursday, February 21, 2002 5:17 PM
Subject: Condensed
Further to the discussion about le Guin and others a while back,
here's a site for those who haven't time to read all those SFF books
and would like to catch up. Why, _everybody's_ there -
http://rinkworks.com/bookaminute/sff.shtml
The Fellowship of the Ring
By J. R. R. Tolkien
Ultra-Condensed by David J. Parker and Samuel Stoddard
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Gandalf
Bilbo Baggins, your Ring is evil. In a couple decades, we'll try to
destroy it. In the meantime, leave it for Frodo to play with.
Bilbo Baggins
It's not evil. It's mine. My precious. Mine! MINE, I TELL YOU!!
MOOHOOHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!
(Frodo takes it to RIVENDELL. Some FRIENDS come with him. They are
attacked by black riders a LOT, and it is SCARY.)
Elrond
Frodo Baggins, if Sauron ever gets this Ring, the world will be
destroyed, and evil will reign forever. We must act quickly. Take the
Ring to where he lives.
(They do some travelling. Some more FRIENDS come with him. Gandalf
DIES in the mines of Moria, but will later be RESURRECTED in
GLORIFIED form having triumphed over EVIL, an obvious literary
ALLUSION to that movie where the guy comes back as a DOG.)
Boromir
Frodo Baggins, give me the Ring.
Frodo
No.
Boromir
What have I done? (dies)
THE END
--
Alison Croggon
Home page
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