I like the opening lines David, then it seems to go a bit too soft (or
abstract) for me before getting back to some kind of voice that was working
at the beginning. If that makes sense. Fun though.
Doug
Douglas Barbour
Department of English
University of Alberta
Edmonton Alberta Canada T6G 2E5
(h) [780] 436 3320 (b) [780] 492 0521
http://www.ualberta.ca/~dbarbour/dbhome.htm
You know, verse
is a lovely thing.
It issues,
like the vapors,
from the rock
Charles Olson
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