Hi Amanda et al ......

I was touched by your sentiments but felt at variance to several of your
following comments.

We all have the capacity to damage ourselves and others. We work with
couples who once loved each other and now in the parting, act out their fear
and hurt by demonstrating hatred and damage towards each other and those
caught up in the split - blaming the other to justify actions.
They are contactful human beings who we work with but they are caught up in
a painful cycle.Their actions are seen as irrational and so are referred to
by the other side as `mad`. This makes us right and them wrong and
suggests no path forward.

Both sides in the American terror claim God to be on their side and describe
the other in negative dismissive terms. Massive demonstrations take place in
Pakistan and elsewhere against America, burning the American flag. America
uses the terms terrorist and fanatic and Bin Laden is no longer a human
being to be engaged
with. Bush, who was widely disliked as a leader yesterday is now leading the
charge from our end with a `God Bless America`.

I have just returned from a Swedish conference of therapists from 32
countries and we couldn't agree on the text of a telegram to be sent as the
views were too wide ranging. People's sense of who was a `terrorist` or
`fanatic` varied a lot. Terrorist undermining society to be locked away one
day, world leader the next (Nelson Mandela etc etc)
Reading the world's press in Sweden was also very illuminating as the same
experiences get described in such different ways and yet it is always
described as though it is `the truth`.

If my family's lives were in serious danger I would go to extremes to
protect them, including I imagine killing who I saw as the attacker.
Expressing the pain and anger and setting up very robust boundaries for
safety feels important. However I think the desire to dismiss the other side
is too easy (pain relief) and blocks out the real situation and
opportunities that may be available for contact and movement. This of course
requires some humility on both sides and I have seen litle from either so
far.

So I appreciated your input but ....
when you say God bless us all, with whose God?
yours controversially
Bob Smith
[log in to unmask]


----- Original Message -----
From: Amanda Poyner <[log in to unmask]>
To: <[log in to unmask]>
Sent: Thursday, September 20, 2001 7:20 PM
Subject: American Situation/updated


> Dear List,
>
> It's now the 20th September, and the following is something that I
> wanted to share with you all last week, but couldn't because of email
> address changes.  But.......  having not been able to participate, but
> to just listen (read) all the mail about the twin towers, and all the
> countless victims (not just the dead, but all those whose lives have
> been shattered), I would now like the opportunity to update my thoughts,
> with your forebearance.
>
> This is what I tried to send to the list last week:
>
> "It is with deepest hearfelt compassion and shock that I witness the
> news over the last 3 days.  It seems to me that the whole world is in
> shock and disbelief over the acts that have been perpetrated by human
> beings, upon other human beings.
>
> Let's face it, if we met these people as clients, it would not be long
> before they were sectioned for their own and others safety!
>
> So, let it be known to all in America, and I speak for myself here, but
> also for humanity in the true sense of the word, that my heart goes out
> to you all.  You are not alone in your sorrow, your shock, your grief,
> but the united world of humanity stands beside you, to hold you up in
> this difficult time.  Be comforted, protected, and be strong in this
> knowledge.
>
> With Love
> Amanda"
>
> I have been glued to '5 live' news programmes and have listened to the
> many opinions, feelings and fears of all the people from politicians, to
> mothers in fear for the future.  What happened in America will/has
> already, changed lives.  This is a fact, and one whose true consequences
> we will only come to know over time.  We will simply have to ride out
> the wave, and hope with all our strength and love that it will not dash
> us all on the rocks.  I am heartened to note the words of wisdom and
> caution, coming from many, and I for one, pray every day, light a candle
> every day, for God's love and wisdom the prevail in whatever action is
> undertaken.
>
> As for Osama Bin Laden - well......  He is a man lost in the world.  Out
> of place in the world.  The whole world is uncomfortable with his
> presence, even Afghanistan are encouraging him to leave their country
> now.  He is a misguided soul.  Misguided.....  I am reminded of the
> spiritual teacher Christ himself, and how if he were here today in a
> physical body, he would utter the words "forgiveness".  This is not to
> "condone", but to "forgive".  Osama Bin Laden, is eaten up within and
> without, by his misguided and dysfunctional beliefs.  If he were someone
> who were to come for therapy to any of us, he is the sort of person
> whose likelihood of doing harm to self or others, would make us sit up
> and take notice; he would be sectioned and taken out of harms way.  But
> he didn't come to us, he found others who are equally misguided, and in
> the name of their god have perpetrated over the years, many acts of
> terror.  Their sick minds have been the instruments of evil, and for
> this I pity their souls.
>
> It is not until now, that this most awful of acts has been perpetrated
> within America, that the world is finally paying attention.  Look at
> Ireland (in the name of religion).  Look at the Middle East (in the name
> of religion).  Look at Afghanistan (in the name of idealistic beliefs).
> Look at Hitler and what happened to the Jews and others (in the name of
> idealistic beliefs).  Kosovo.  Chechnia. South Africa. Bosnia.  Russia.
> In fact, name me a country that does not have these elements within
> it.   Idealism. Fanaticism.  Racism.  The non acceptance of difference.
> The play of power all over the world, has played itself out over the
> centuries, wrapped up in the name of Religious Belief; wrapped up in the
> name of God.  I wonder what God would want to say about all this?
>
> How has it come to this?  And now we are preparing for .... what?  War?
> What will that achieve?  What really are the underlying issues.  If we
> look at the world as a macrocosm of the microcosm, (a reflection of our
> individual struggles with the darkness and light within us), then what
> is the world living out?  what has the world created for itself?  How
> has it come to this?  These are the questions and others like them, that
> will lead the world to heal this darkness, like the shadow side of our
> nature, that we have ignored and buried and projected outside of
> ourselves, until it has become this almighty noise and pain in the
> world.  And at what cost!
>
> I wonder......  Do our world leaders really appreciate what they are
> dealing with, and the delicacy with which it needs to be handled?
>
> Sorry for this lengthy mail, but I just realise that I've had a lot to
> say, and only just had the opportunity.
> Thanks for listening, those that have managed to read all this.
>
> God Bless Us All
> Amanda
>
>